My Journal Experience

For the last two months, I have been writing a journal. The purpose of the journal was to explore my creativity and myself. The main rule was to write for 10 minutes a day five times a week. As of now, two months later, I've written a total of 41 entries and one activity. The writing process has been an interesting journey. I've written about many things but they can all be categorized into a certain set of topics. I was able to express myself and express thoughts on paper that I might have never expressed out loud. In writing these sorts of things, I gained insight into myself. There was a particularly emotional subject and writing about it allowed me to overcome the situation.

(Image from http://margorabb.com/news-events/page/2/)

I've written about my day-to-day life, my opinions, my work, my studies, my stress, my training,  my personal frustrations and about some emotional situations. There are also a couple of entries without a central topic. They are just direct anecdotes about the thoughts that passed through my mind at the time. At first, my writing didn't “flow” very well. Even though I didn't stop writing to think about what I was going to write next, I did think about it as I wrote. Later on, my writing was very instinctive and my hand just moved, writing down the thoughts that passed through my mind. At first, I wanted to keep each journal entry enclosed in a certain topic. So I guess that’s why I’d think about what to write next, so as to not get side tracked. But then, as I kept writing, I wrote about whatever came to my mind at the moment and I usually didn't have time to sidetrack back into what I was saying. So on many occasions, I’d start writing and thinking that I was going to write about something specific, and end up writing about something else.

In a couple of entries, I naturally began rhyming and writing my sentences as if it were a poem. In a couple of other entries, I also had a few “funny sections” where I’d just write something that at least I’d think was funny. These kinds of things enhanced my creativity and allowed my ideas to flow. The flow of ideas is very important in the field of engineering, which is my major, and now I’m able to express my ideas as soon as they “pop” into my head without giving them a lot of thought. It might seem counter intuitive since you might just say something "stupid", but that’s part of the creative process in a group.

In writing, I learned hidden motivations, worries and insecurities that I might have played around with earlier but I never faced them directly. Since I had to keep writing, I was forced to confront these things that I had previously evaded. The idea that no one will ever read my journal is what allowed me to keep writing about these subjects. It was actually very liberating to get them off my chest and into writing. These made them real and not an abstract idea in my mind. By making them real, I was able to confront them. That, to me, is the most valuable thing gained from writing my journal.

There was a particularly emotional subject about which I wrote on two consecutive days followed by writing about it on the journal activity that I mentioned before. Writing about the subject allowed me to overcome the situation. I had been carrying the issue for a long time, so it’s a reel relief that I was able to overcome it. I had always thought that writing about it or sharing with a friend might have helped. Sharing with a couple of friends didn't help and I never got to the task of writing about it. Then, one day, I just began writing about it, and the next day as well. To me, it was unexpected and quite a relief.

I liked the experience of writing a journal and I’d like to keep doing so. However, I probably won’t, at least not immediately. I’ll probably write in the same manner from time to time, when I feel like I need to write and get something off my chest. But it will probably not be part of my day-to-day routine. I’d still recommend the journal writing experience to anyone interested in exploring who they are, and interested in achieving a more natural flow of ideas.

The Underlying Conflict of Class Struggle in "A Room with a View"

The 1985 film “A Room with a View,” based on E.M. Foster’s 1908 novel of the same name, presents the situation of a young woman, Lucy Honeychurch, who does not wish to live by society's standards and expectations. This is seen from the beginning of the film, but her desire intensifies when she falls in love with George Emerson, a man who is below her social class. Lucy, leaving her moment with George behind, then accepts to marry Cecil Vyse, an upper class gentleman. This gives rise to the conflict of class struggle and discrimination. The difference in social classes is seen through the character’s attires, their houses and the activities that they enjoy. The social class discrimination is an underlying conflict in the story and it has great influence in Lucy’s decisions.

(Image from http://blogs.indiewire.com/thompsononhollywood/trailers-from-hell-gets-a-room-with-a-view-20150309)

                At first, while Lucy vacations in Italy, the class difference between her and the Emersons is not so clear. The distinguishing act is when Mr. Emerson calls out that it’s illogical for Lucy and her chaperone, Charlotte, to uphold such social niceties by not accepting the room with a view when the girls want it and the Emersons don’t. The fact that they are both staying in the same hotel means that they must be more or less in the same social class. Thus, both could be classified in the middle class. The distinction is made clear when Lucy returns to England and Mr. Emerson then moves to England. Lucy lives in a big, lavish house, while Mr. Emerson moves in to a small villa. This distinguishes Lucy as belonging to the upper middle class and the Emersons as belonging to the lower middle class. Another clear distinction is seen through their modes of transportation. Lucy’s primary vehicle is a horse-drawn carriage, while George’s primary vehicle is a bicycle. When we introduce Cecil into the comparison, the distinction between classes is even clearer. Cecil belongs to the upper class. It is most clear through his attire and his attitude. He is pretentious and dislikes Lucy’s town. Cecil is always wearing very extravagant clothes. He wears mainly a fine suit and tie, while George mainly wears ragged casual pants and a shirt. Lucy’s attire is somewhere in the middle between Cecil and George, but leaning more towards Cecil’s extreme.

                Each character’s actions are also clear indications of what social class they belong to. For example, both Cecil and George attend to the same lake at the different moments. When Cecil attends, he is very quiet and reserved, as always, and does not even consider going in for a swim at the lake. On the other hand, when George attends the lake, it is with the intention of going in for a swim. He goes with Lucy’s brother and Mr. Beebe and they all play, splash the water and run around the lake. This sort of behavior is too foolish for Cecil’s upper class. Another clear distinction is seen when Lucy, George and others are playing tennis while Cecil stands idly by reading a book. When George leaves and Freddy asks Cecil to join them, Cecil refuses and proudly admits to being only good for books, as if such activities were beneath him.

                The presented distinctions in looks and behavior evidence the social class discrimination seen in “A Room with a View.” This underlying conflict is an important factor in Lucy’s decision to end her engagement with Cecil and in her ultimate decision of allowing herself to love George. Cecil saw Lucy as a possession and a prize to show off, while George really loved her for who she was. Lucy realized that she didn’t want to be sucked into Cecil’s upper class manners and traditions, and that what she really wanted was Cecil’s genuine and humble love; thus evidencing the underlying conflict of class struggle.